Update various github actions and node versions

[koddsson]

What I did

1. I updated some old node versions in CI (node 16 is no longer supported)
2. I updated some github actions
3. I changed some npm commands from npm install --ci to npm ci

[changeset-bot]

⚠️ No Changeset found

Latest commit: e15c5d8

Merging this PR will not cause a version bump for any packages. If these changes should not result in a new version, you're good to go. If these changes should result in a version bump, you need to add a changeset.

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[koddsson]

I.. did not expect this many errors.

[koddsson]

An admin is going to need to update the required PR builds so that node 18 is required and not 16 if we are going to merge this.